Friday 18 November 2011

CRT means...

When we asked the TwitGP collective what they thought CRT stood for, the answers came just like BSB racer Karl Harris - thick and fast. 


There were the suggestions which poignantly highlighted the inescapable truth, such as: 
Cheap Racing Teams (@jonomarshall & @matt_linley_85), 
Cash Really Tight (@FutureMrsRossi & @markhunter80), 
Can't Reach T'podium (@sofaracer, in tribute to Paul Bird), 
Cheaply Run Tailenders (@richbrammer), 
Couldn't Race Treacle (@inspiredbyJB), 
Contrived Racing Time (@harleyholeshot) 
and perhaps most harshly of all, @izzymotogp's feeling that the teams are so slow they'll have to Conclude Race Tomorrow


Then there were those who took a more technological stance, like @garethgrif with Constant Rule Tweaking, and like @smuttiesmith, who, channeling Pete Clifford, thought CRT must stand for: Customised Road Tat


We were particularly tickled by the entries which realised the only thing the sluggish CRT teams will succeed at next year is in pissing off loveable World Champ Casey Loner. Bask in the magnificent prescience of: 
Casey's Roadblock Torment (@frumtarn77) and 
Casey's Rage Targets (@powderfinger71)
or indeed Casey's Rage Trigger (@MotoGPJules). 


Some of you approached the CRT problem from the rider's perspective, although it has to be said @antony_e's Can't Ride This is more likely to be heard exclaimed than @ducatistamag's Crazy Riding Techniques now Iannone won't be in the category. 


For sheer accuracy we have to applaud: 
Capirossi's Really Tiny (@jackweds), 
Colin's Retirement Team (@delfolds), 
and the skilful use of punctuation which gives us @kiyofan's: Close Racing? Tosh! 


Unfortunately, TwitGP's mother had her suggestion rejected by the FIM. They didn't think C*nts Riding Tediously fairly reflected the spirit of MotoGP's next iteration.


Meanwhile a special commendation goes to @mrstaylor1975 for Caught Rubbing Tits. We've all been there, particularly Olivier Jacques. On CCTV. Basically amazing.


But inevitably, our favourite, for its delicious use of language, was @scrat67's:
Crawling Round Torpidly


Thanks to all those who took part - you all really have improved immeasurably since we first started doing these sort of "audience participation" routines. 


PS - @franckds55 seemed to think that CRT stood for Claiming Rule Teams - which is of course the most ludicrous concept of all.